Gabriel in Muir Woods 2018 
Journal 1 pg 76 – Dreams
| Dreams – . |
| I had a dream about Gabriel. He was making films. We had been waiting for a bus together but then realized we were on the wrong street. . |
| One curved round along the exterior of the neighborhood in a sweeping motion while the others ran in parallel and perpendicular lines to the houses. So we started to walk south. As we walked, it was as if he was narrating parts of his life and we were filming it simultaneously. . |
| His voice was deeper than it is now. It’s so peculiar in reflection. I know his voice immediately, as if I could hear the trajectory of his voice in a constant arc and landing in the future, so any changes were expected and comfortable. . |
| I think he generally has a confident tone; so that he sounded so assured (then? In the future? Now?) lent authenticity. . |
| We crossed this threshold into a gothic looking house. I remember crossing over the fence to get him into it. And then we were short on time. He and his friend had to hurry along to make it. And I watched him go. . |
| Proud of what he’s doing, who he’s become. [there was a portcullis between us and I stood at the threshold watching him leave and disappear into the darkening street as he walked and talked with his friend (9/16/2020)]. . |
| 10/27/2020 – I read this to him once I got back from my travels last summer. I’m glad that I did. It was a curious little dream, but I have a lot of them and it could’ve been easy to dismiss the dream and think “oh it doesn’t mean much, really”. But I was able to say to him that I dreamed of him and that I was proud – in my dream and in real life – of who he is and becoming. I didn’t realize at that moment that I’d only have two months left with him in this life. |